To Mr. Meghdoot Sharon, Correspondent, CNN-IBN

Dear Mr. Meghdoot Sharon,

Warm Greetings. I'm writing to you regarding your article headlined BJP makes bachelor CM its ladies' man in Guj on IBNlive.com on Dec 3, 2007.

While I understand that Mr. Rajdeep Sardesai is your boss and you might feeling honoured to work with an intellectual like him, it doesn't necessarily mean that you share the same disgust that Mr. Sardesai has for Mr. Modi. It's a different thing if it is a company policy in CNN-IBN to always spew venom at Mr. Modi, however flimsy or trivial the reason for that great piece of journalism maybe. If you and your team are that sure about Mr. Modi's complicity in the riots, which are to be condemned in the strongest of terms, please come out with hard facts and take on Mr. Modi. Do not fight from the comfort of your air-conditioned glass-walled studios, that's not fair. Give the other person a chance to respond. And if the belief is that the evidence is all there and still there's no action, then there's something seriously wrong in the justice delivery system in our country and maybe that is what you should be looking at setting right, and not targetting an individual. In fact, Mr. Modi appears more dignified with his silence compared to your repeated diatribes, which are, more often than not, are needlessly vitriolic and below the belt. What about this article headlined Modi sells Guj Inc, 'appeases rich and ignores poor' which appeared on Nov 18. Articles like these, Mr. Sharon, are not, in good spirit and smack of vengence and a huge sense of political and maybe, even personal vendetta. It doesn't appear to be reporting or journalism, it's sleazy and sickening.

I don't think I need to clarify, but I'm no supporter of Mr Modi. If that man is found guilty by a court of law and even if he's to be hanged for the crime he's to have committed, so be it. But do not become the judge yourself. I'm reminded of that famous quote from Spiderman here. At least, credit him for the work he has done in his term as the Chief Minister. And if you stay in Gujarat and have seen things around you while you report, I'm sure you'd agree with me, that development in Gujarat has happened, and has happened at a good pace.

Good Night, And Good Luck

Regards,
Nikhil Kulkarni

Teetotaller Of A Different Kind

It's a very proud moment for all of us at CircusMouse. And we wear that pride up our sleeves, literally. Hence the t-shirt.

What the bloody hell is this?

From the world's best blahg comes the world's best t-shirt. To cut the long story shirt short, here's the t-shirt for you. Do not get distracted by the wonderful modull model posing with the t-shirt, pay attention to the wonderful t-shirt instead.

Front:




















Back:




















Damn, it's such a stupid t-shirt

Really? You either get it or you don't. And if you have not, get out on the road, walk for 23 meters - not a meter more, not a meter less. Wait there and ask the first female walking by
carrying a purple handkerchief. She will know for sure. Huh.

Ok, I've got it. How do I get the t-shirt?

See, now you're talking sense. This t-shirt might be the best piece of visible fabric your body has ever had on it. Of course, there are better pieces of fabric your body would've had on it and much closer than this t-shirt. But we have learnt our Moral Science lessons well and we know exposing is not appropriate. Hence, this t-shirt comes with an OK certificate from the Exposure Control Authority Of India.

If you want to get this amazing creation, indicate in the comments to the post or write to 10plus3i@gmail.com. Here are the details -

Size - The model in the photo above is wearing an M size t-shirt. So an L would probably fit most men to the tee. An M for most women?

Cost - Higher the quantity of the order, lower will be the price. Estimated price is Rs. 200. And we'll try to keep it within that.

Quality - Fairly Decent.

Delivery - It's that good, eh? That you want it delivered right away? We're glad. Tell us if you want the t-shirt either by comments or by e-mail. We'll see how many t-shirt we're printing, arrive at the cost of one t-shirt and then get in touch with you for the address. Delivery charges extra. Definitely lesser than most maternity hospitals.

To hell with you. Absolute bullshit this is. Such huge fuss over such non-sense.

We're happy. At least someone is honest. Now if you'd only let us what about the t-shirt makes you feel that way. That it's a t-shirt and not a t-short? That it has Gabbar and not Mogambo? That the idea in itself is ridiculous? Tell us, please.

The Head And Tail Of It Or The Problem With Probability

I was tossing what seemed like a totally biased five rupee coin to decide the outcome of something. Heads was Yes and tails was No. And in that five throws experiment, tails turned up each time. Was I then fighting against odds, literally?

Point Your Mouse To

No pun intended, unless you thought of that thing as a mouse. Let's not get into the pun trap, or punt rap for now!

Point your mouse to CircusMouse. Lot of action happening there. And someone likes posts on CircusMouse doesn't mean he's gay for me. Gay for me? Now, as a young thing would say - How gay is that, Sahu? Perhaps he liked this guy's one's only post on that blog. Hence gay maybe.

Random Remembrances.

• India- Australia Cricket Match at Chinnaswamy Stadium. [photos] No, we didn't heckle Symonds. But had awesome fun with Dada, Karthik and Powar fielding at the boundary right in front of us. Cricket will never die in India. And Cricket is a simple game of heart, mind, bat, ball and a couple of guards for safety. The excessively annoying TV coverage is doing no good to the gentleman's game it is it once was. Hope though, is still alive.

• The mid-night trek to Skandagiri [photos] following the match. That I was tired and exhausted would be an understatement, and that I was a bicycle because I was too tired would be a wonderstatement. Puns aside or puns-a-side, I still have no clue about the source of energy that kept me alive during the trek. Thank heavens(we were definitely closer to it) for the life-saving omlettes and tea at the summit. The trek would be incomplete without the mention of birth of Joshi, a person who existed amidst us all along, but we had no idea about him. Thanks to a certain America-bound dude, we discovered his existence and he's been living with us since then. The day Joshi's true identity is revealed would be the day when this polite, gentlemanly, mature Nikhil Kulkarni's make-believe identity will be known. Till then, live and thrive, Joshi.
  

• A Walk In The Clouds, Caffeine, Bhool Bhulaiyaa, Laaga Chunari Mein Aag, Morning Raaga (Oh fuck! How could I forget Apparao and Annapoorna? Wake Up!), Tout Va Bien (Everything Is Alright - that's the movie's name in English!), Un homme et une femme (A Man And A Woman)
  
• A special mention. We were brave enough to watch this one - The Brave One. Clovie, get out of the car! Those who suffered this at my hands, or my mouth rather, after this movie, should feel honoured. Gods (Warner Brothers, that is) have heard us and we have this great news - Warner Bros says “No More Female Lead Characters”?!
  only to be followed by Warner Bros Denies Comments.
  Huh, no reward for our bravery.

• The trips home, the series of forgotten birthdays, the chull that was finally put to rest a minute back (Aw fuck! Commander will go crazy over this!) , the falling ill and getting back to life again, Octoberfest, the Bangalore Book Festival, the visit to that insti, the scary predictions(I should stop doing that now!)......
  

• Pustakaaha
• Londonstani - rudeboy rules, rudeboys rule! Samira Ahmed, Product Marketing and innit! Absolute must-read.
• Games Indians Play - interesting, especially the application of the behavioural economics tools to understand why we are the way we are. In addition to things mentioned here, I want to become a Behavioural Economist. Very fancy it sounds. Absolutely. And that's not the only reason I want to become one.
  
• A book on the best upcoming writing in Indian English edited by Kushwant Singh.
  
• Plans are to read Butter Chicken In Ludhiana during the upcoming trip to Kanpur. If the previous trip out of Bangalore was anything to go by, this one should be great fun! The same refrain again - but that was Mumbai! This one is no less either- Bangalore->Delhi->Lucknow->Kanpur->Lucknow->Delhi->Bangalore. Should be fun enough.
  

PS. Began this post with just the thought of directing readers to CircusMouse, but it ended up being an almost-complete update post. I'm glad it came. Good for the well-being of this world. Om Shanti Om. Huh, the movie's noise these days. Shanti Shanti. Huh, that's Mandira Bedi. Ab Bas. Huh, that's Diana Hayden.

No Hyphen No Fun

Hyphens, are were fun. Sad, they've killed some 16,000 of them. That's leap-frogging leapfrogging into the past. Huh. Perhaps CNN-IBN themselves(now, this one is with the hyphen) could definitely pick up a thing and a quarter from here.

Death Of A Great Brand Or Birth Of A Greater Brand?

Change is good. Definitely. Hutch is now Vodafone. Good? Not very sure. More than its SIM cards made it into our mobile phones, Hutch - the brand, had made its way into our hearts. Not entirely impossible, but it will be very difficult for Vodafone to replace Hutch. Let's see. We'll let the brand do the talking. Of course, we'll do the talking ourselves. Using their phones and services, that is.

It was an interesting experience last night, being a witness to perhaps one of the biggest brand transitions of our life time happen on the ground. Transition it was, of the Hutch signboards being replaced by those of Vodafone.

The Hutch signboard. Perhaps one of the very few still left in the city at that time of the night.


Loosening Tied Ends - I


Loosening Tied Ends - II



Call Disconnected


Dialing A New Number


Connection Established!


Call Continues


New Up, Old Down!


New Connection Firmly In Place.


While I was taking these pictures, the owner of the shop of which the board was being replaced was giving me a very menacing stare. Apparently, he was under the impression that I was from Hutch/Vodafone and was agitated with the fact that his shop's name was wrongly printed in the signboard! Talk of a deal running into billions of dollars and not enough attention to such important details! Hope they get it right soon.

Rebranding at this scale always comes with some very amusing stories. That of UTI Bank Axis Bank, for example. Do not know how much the re-branding exercise cost them, but it definitely cost them much more in Karnataka. Everyone saw the Axis Bank boards with a certain patch covered and over-written by hand, due to a mistake in printing of the boards.


PS. Here's the Hutch Is Now Vodafone TVC. Decent, but not as nice as the Hutch commercials. Wonder if there will be any at all, as nice as the Hutch commercials.

Oh! It's September 11 Today? The Mumbai Trip Update

I do not know what hidden energy was it that made my dead-twice-over brain to remember that it is September 11 today. More so because our flight back to Bangalore was canceled at the last minute, at 6:59 am IST to be precise. A technical snag, apparently because of a bird-hit. Interesting coincidence, we get a lot of time to rest here in the Airport and it is peaceful here. Scary!

I'm not sure if I am alive. If I am not alive, how the hell am I writing this? I think(think? Can I? Then I must be alive!) I'm living on the Mumbai air, the highest quality oxygen one can ever breathe. There is something about this place that draws me closer to it and makes me fall more and more in love with it everytime I visit this place or stay here.

Carrying back from Mumbai - memories of those days in Mumbai with Scott, Cafe Leopold, Cafe Mondegar, Mahalaxmi, Haji Ali, Raghuram's Scraping Wealth At The Bottom Of The Pyramid and Missile In The Toilet Bowl theories, Trishna, Momos with Kaak, sweat, heat, rain, Desi Chicken at Harish, Mocha at Juhu, that and all that!

Update: Reached Bangalore safe and mentally unsound sound. The day was quite eventful - starting at 5 am, three security checks, sneaking out and back into the airport, the slow and patchy internet connection which we paid for and the really fast internet which was available for free! Have I figured it yet? Here's an attempt though. Mumbai is very humbling, the more one discovers Mumbai, humbler one feels. Mumbai makes one's survival instincts stronger, makes us aware of the fact that no hard work is hard work enough. There's always someone else working harder than one is. There's so much energy, hope and optimism in the Mumbai air. One might be the queen of any land, but while in Mumbai, everyone is the same. But for the Queen of Englad though, they built the Gateway Of India!